NEWS ITEM 6 November 1995
BBN Holds 35th Annual Meeting
Sturdleigh Press International
It was a brisk and bright November morning in Boston as the Attendees gathered for the
35th Annual Meeting of Bolt Beranek and Newman Inc. (NYSE: BBN) (Also, as it turns out, the last annual meeting for the Company so named!) Coffee and microdanish were dispensed if one ran his card through the reader on an ATM machine - synchronously, if one rejected cream in the coffee.
There were Small Talk and Mixing, midst the various computer monitors, each displaying the Company's Home Page on the Web. Members of the VP's Club moved about, collecting the empty cups and used napkins (saving both to be washed and reused.)
The Official Call was given at just the right time, and All filed into the Auditorium to the strains (and stresses) of the Corporate Anthem, played by the Domain Concert Orchestra in their Forma T-shirts emblazoned with "The Bug Stops Here" (apparently a reference to an old VW Service Commercial).
Former Chief was recognized (by several of the attendees) and thanked for his contributions, lo these many years. New Chief then took over to run the formal part of the meeting.
Motions were made and seconded. Proxies had been counted, and the numbers were reported. The following actions were taken:
· The Company's name was changed to "BBN Ccorporation", since we don't do accoustics (sic) much any more. (The extra "c's" are courtesy of the Proxy Statement.)
· Directors were elected
· Shares were increased,
· Auditors were approved, and
· New types of Executive compensation were enabled.
The formal part of the Meeting now having been completed, Chief (New) held forth with slides and charts to explain how it was, is now, and how it shall be; what's hot and what's not. All the visuals sported the new black-and-blue Logo, complete with its puddle.
The happenings were recounted, including:
• Offices opened and closed
• Companies acquired and sold
• Agreements agreed upon
Subsidiaries formed and named, such as
Comet, Pdomain, Bark, and quite a handful of others
In addition a number of possible new ventures, contemplated, but not yet established, were mentioned:
· An experiment in Adventure Capital: "Central America on Line"
· A School of Defensive Driving: "Compu-Swerve or Net-Scrape!"
· A Computer Game: "Eye Browse: Find a Gopher"
· A Craft Kit: "Interknot MacRame"
*If you're knot working, you're not working!'
We'll keep you posted on any further developments.
Attendees also learned that LAN, WAN, PANS, and POT will probably merge their operations if they can come up with a catchy name for the group. Someone said, "The opportunities are vast but that may have been an exaggeration.
The appropriate persons within the Corporation are planning to produce a dictionary to document the burgeoning New Speak. Each employee will receive a copy, and will be given lessons on when and how to use the terms and phrases. This effort will presumably help to Grow the Coffers, etc.
In the Comet Subsidiary, where Safety Patrol assures well- being at WEB crossings, Berner von Feirwahl is in charge. Just for the heck of it Bernie has been SATAN-Tested, and passed with frying colors. All this has something to do with Securities. Check it out with your broker.
We understand that Bernie has in his shop at home a choke router, and a fully encripted management and monitoring infrasturcture, both of which he picked up at our garage sale following one of our previous corporate restructurings.
One aditional note: Thanksgiving is coming, and you should know that Comet's ENHANCED TURKEY SECURITY SERVICE is now available. Pick one up at your local Supermarket.
During the year the Company Newspaper has reported on the goings-on around the Campus. Among the stories carried were:
Observatory, sights Planet (See Fig 1)
THE BOSTON GLOBE n MONDAY, OCTOBER 23, 1995
"This clearly is a rare bird in the planetary zoo," said Geoffrey Marcy, an astronomer at San Francisco State University who last week reported an independent confirmation of the planets discovery. The find had been announced a week earlier by Michel Mayor and Didier Queloz from the Geneva Observatory in Switzerland.
"Oh man, is this wierd!" added astronomer David Latham of the Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics in Cambridge, who last week tentatively reported the discovery of a second planet orbiting 51 Pegasi. "IVs certainly not what the traditional ideas would have predicted."
Regardless of its oddity, astronomers are celebrating this discovery as a partial fulfillment of one of the science's oldest and most passionate pursuits: Other worlds that might be found to harbor life, perhaps even intelligent life. While this planet is far too hot for life, its very existence next to a star very much like our sun suggests that other planets might also be nearby.
· Shan of Konradistan visits BBN
· Shan taken on tour
· Shan inspects New Logo
· Logo EXPLODES! (See Fig 2)
(Same thing happened several times in the Annual Report. Logo may well be dangerous.)
· Shan takes Fit
· Security suspects Fowl Play; asks employees "Where were you when this happened?"
· SEER consults Planets
We are apparently living in interesting times.
The Renouned Poetess, C. Jane Runn, was again sought out for a poetic contribution for the
Annual Meeting celebration. She agreed to give it a try, although she is still pretty much worn-out from her work in cooperating on a recent effort in recognition of the New Logo. She penned:
Two Nets converged on a Yellow Webbit, not knowing 'ere to cred or debit .....
and stopped there. Apparently fatigue took over. She may try again next year.
As is traditional, Box Lunches were passed out to those present. This year the lunches comprised Baked Harx* with Wordsauce. This elaborate item was a step up from the past, and people seemed pleased. Also in each lunch box was a serving of Whirled White Web, a new dessert. Lunch was served by servers using high-speed Servers (who also only stand and wait) (on tables). (We think that's what we were told.)
Dismissal was sounded; the Directors left for their lunch (which was probably NOT Baked Harx), and the Civilians found their way out. We'll check back next year to see how the losses are going.
* Harx is actually a breakfast cereal. The Ccompany has heard from Harx's maker regarding possible infringement of its Trademark