Association of -ISM's Against -ITY's
A small selection of members from both Groups:
| -ISM's (The Good Guys) | -ITY's (The Bad Guys) |
| Communism | Conformity |
| Marxism | Superiority |
| Capitalism | Christianity |
| Buddhism | Normality |
| Discordianism | Vanity |
| Philanthropism | |
| Altruism | |
| Confucianism | |
| Optimism |
Most philosophies are fairly reasonable. They respect each other, usually at least. Look at all the -ISM's. They're all content to either agree or disagree with each other. Communism, Capitalism, they get along okay. They disagree, but they leave their differences in the third world countries and can peacefully coexist. Not all philosophies are that peaceful and compliant however. Some don't get along so well, in fact, some are downright arrogant. Look at the -ITY's. Notice how there are less of them. They form a sort of a clique and only associate with other members of the clique. Sometimes they some out and subvert one of the peaceful -ISM's, giving the ISM a bad name.
An example being the Vietnam war. Supposedly fought over such amicable ideas as Communism, Capitalism and altruism, but really, it was the evil forces of Superiority and Conformity subverting those unsuspecing pawns. Another example is the crusades. What -ISM's were behind that? None of them! It was all -ITY's! Christianity, Conformity, Vanity, and Superiority. These -ITY's! Are they saying they're better than the other philosophies? What right do they have to assume a different suffix? Aren't they philosophies and ideas just like the rest of us?
It's okay if you believe in a few -ITY's, but make sure that you believe in at least 5 more -ISM's than -ITY's. We all have a few ITY's that have already made their way into our minds, and therefore we like them, but try not to pick up any more of these elitist, arrogant, dominating, brainwashing, evil ideas. If you already have more -ITY's than -ISM's, you may be in serious trouble, but if you're reading this it's a step in the right direction. Try to find a new -ISM each day and practice it constantly. Concentrate on it a few times a day, when you're brushing your teeth, when you're stuck in traffic, when you're flossing your cats or when you're editing a web page. In a few weeks, you should be a decent person again.
Down with those arrogant -ITY's!
Take up a new -ISM today!
fnord
